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The Falcon’s Malteser Tickets

The Vaults, London4.016 reviews
The Falcon's Malteser to take to stage at The Vaults this summer for a strictly limited season.

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The Falcon’s Malteser The Vaults London tickets on sale now!

The acclaimed stage adaptation of Anthony Horowitz’s laugh-out-loud funny novel of the same name has come to London's Vaults this summer for a strictly limited season.

What is The Falcon’s Malteser about?

Anthony Horowitz's The Falcon’s Malteser introduces the Diamond Brothers Detective Agency. Tim is without a doubt the absolute worst private investigator on the planet. Can his younger brother, the clever Nick, manage to help his detectively-challenged brother crack the toughest case in the detective agency's history?

A midget Mexican delivers a box of Maltesers, but what makes these chocolate treats so special to the point where half of London's gangs and criminals are determined to kill to get their hands on them? This acclaimed adaption from New Old Friends stars four actors portraying dozens of roles along with unforgettable comedy songs and a fully-staged car chase scene that will have you on the edge of your seats!

The Falcon’s Malteser creatives

The Falcon’s Malteser was adapted for the stage by Feargus Woods Dunlop and is directed by Heather Westwell and Lee Lyford. It features design by Carl Davies and was originally produced by New Old Friends in association with Theatre Royal Bath's Egg and Newbury Corn Exchange.

What the critics have been saying about The Falcon’s Malteser

The Falcon’s Malteser has received overwhelming critical acclaim. It's been called 'exhilarating' (WhatsOnStage), 'delightful' (Broadway Baby), 'bundles of fun and excitement' (Love London Love Culture), 'wonderful fun for both young and old' (The Spy in the Stalls), and the 'Best Family Shows Critic's Choice' (The Guardian).

Affordable tickets for The Falcon’s Malteser at The Vaults available now!

See what everyone has been raving about and book your tickets now for the strictly-limited run of The Falcon's Malteser while stocks last. The best seats and tickets prices are subject to high demand!

Additional Information

Running time

1hr 20min (no interval)

Performance dates

17 July -­ 25 August 2019

Special notes

Diamond ticket holders will be seated in the front rows of the theatre in reserved cabaret-style seating.

Gold ticket holders will be seated in the general admission area of the theatre, and can select their own seats upon arrival.

A limited number of Early Bird tickets are available at each performance and offer reduced price seating within the Gold area

Latecomers will not be admitted. Due to nature of the space it may not be possible to readmit patrons.

Venue Information

The VaultsLauncelot Street, London, SE1 7AD

Customer Reviews

16 reviews4.0

Mrs Rees25th August

Brilliant production and really well acted - so fun to watch - thank you! ??

Elizabeth Slater22nd August

Great fun. Lots of energy in the cast and a good laugh.

Mick Bond19th August

Funny play, well acted, some issues with acoustics

beecroft, sarah16th August

Fun but pretty stupid

David Spenwyn14th August


customer5th August

For the price of these tickets the show felt workshopped. Accurate direction on slapstick and timing was missing and so many adult laughs were lost. The show lacked substance and atmosphere.

Laura colucci31st July

Excellent performance!

Caroline Hebbert29th July

slick and witty production, with laugh out loud humour, great pace and tour de force acting from the small cast. Only quibble was the high price of the tickets, especially no discount for children given it was a children's show and given the fun but not exactly lavish venue.

customer28th July

Enthusiastic actors - venue / staff unfortunate

customer22nd July

Excellent play, and good ambience, although my seat was broken. Slight issue re location as London Theatre Direct gave the wrong address, but we got there just in time.

Joanne Wilcox22nd July

My family loved this show, ages 11 to 51! The portrayal of the story was done very well, we all laughed out loud at the brilliant acting.

Adam T20th July

The show was very funny with an impressive talented cast and clever directing which captures the feel of the book perfectly.